Monday, January 5, 2009

what to watch for in 09: the return of ska!!!

I was looking through old CDs the other day (because just about the only thing I do when I'm home is wallow in nostalgia) and ended up listening to a Catch 22 song for the first time since I graduated high school. It was this one in particular (but the original, not the Streetlight Manifesto cover):

Now I'm convinced that a ska comeback would make the world immeasurably better.

Right now, popular music is dominated by two styles of music: a combination of this weird, barely-classifiable hybrid of pop-punk and emo, and ringtone rap. This definitely explains why Gym Class Heroes, who've managed to combine these two genres into one supergroup of ridiculousness, are so popular.

Why else would they be famous? (Let's not forget that they enabled Katy Perry to play not one or two but THREE singles on the radio. That in itself is a capital offense.) Since I'm pretty sure that none of these guys play a brass instrument--they're gym class heroes, not band geeks--a ska comeback would completely remove them from the music industry. Ska could function like a form of musical social Darwinism in that if you can't play an instrument at least semi-proficiently, you're done. Granted, social Darwinism wasn't too hot an idea when we used it to justify eugenics and all that, but you know it'd be hilarious to see Soulja Boy on MTV Hits singing to his girl about kissing him through his trombone.

A ska comeback would also get rid of all the hipster trash that's been littering our streets since, like, 2005. Skinny jeans wouldn't be out of the picture for practical purposes--it's easier to skank when you're not burdened by a flared hem. Nor would keffiyehs, since the houndstooth can easily be replaced by a checkerboard pattern. (It's cool, though, cause I like both of these trends.) But there'd be no better way to get rid of the apathy my generation is famous for than to remove the pretentious scenester from the picture. Ska is the anthem for change we can believe in!

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